When it comes to breakups, there's really no such thing as good or bad. Whether you got dumped, dumped someone or just arrived to a mutual decision; even for whatever variety of reasons like third-parties bullshits, it's-not-you-it's-me bullshit, got-no-time bullshits, I-need-to-find-myself bullshit, falling-out-of-love bullshits, etcetera bullshits; Breakup is simply not a pretty sight. Tears can't be helped.
For the first few weeks or even months after that big breakup thing, (most often than not), you're a total mess (esp. If you're the one who's in the uglier side of breakup). And that's inevitable. You want to get out of the situation right away; that if there's a universal remote control, you'll probably would want to hit the fast-forward button and get to the time when you're moved on and okay again. Anything to skipped that period that even seeing a comedy movie makes you cry. (Actually makes you feel a lot stupid).
Breakup, in itself alone, is already too awful. But, [NEWS FLASH] Mr. Breakup has its price and consequences. (And trust me), it’s quite huge: his girlfriend, Ms. Trust Issues.
These are three (3) of the reasons why you have trust issues after breakup:
(1) YOU CAN'T TRUST YOURSELF
You're too afraid to go out and entrust yourself to make another decision to actually trust someone again just to realize that that person isn’t trustworthy enough and just ending up having more trust issues more than ever. (HA! Now breathe, that's quite a read). I pro'lly have said the word 'trust' a gazillion time, but yeah, you get the idea. I know, it couldn’t be more complicated.
(2) YOU CAN'T TRUST YOUR EX
I mean, how can you ever trust your ex (who hurt you) again? (Or, yourself, to be sure that you won't hurt him/her again?). Really? Enough said.
(3) YOU CAN'T TRUST A NEW PROSPECT
Worst-case scenario: You were in this 6-year long, everything's-perfect, once a great relationship. You started laying out plans for the future. You saw yourself being with him (her) for the rest of your life. And, then you discovered that you're not the only one he's (she's) making those plans with. (Uh-oh!) What's even worst was you were the 'third party'. (Oh, snap! Kill me now). And, then of course (assuming that you're not a martyr lover), you broke up with the douchebag.
Now, here's the million dollar question: How can you possibly trust someone you just met (or, you just start dating) not to hurt you when a person you loved and thought loved you as much get to hurt you? Really?
I know, they are two different people and you shouldn't judge a person based on your experience with the other one. But that’s just how it is. It happens. TRUST should be earned. It takes time. It's more precious than gold.
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